Renee Graziano is reflecting on the “darkish world” of habit that she was capable of overcome.
The 56-year-old Mob Wives alum — who’s now sober — appeared on the most recent episode of PageSix’s Digital Reali-Tea podcast and spoke concerning the actuality of her previous substance abuse.
“Dependancy is a darkish world. I used to be by no means hooked on medication. I used to be hooked on energy, I used to be hooked on males, I used to be hooked on my world, my way of life,” she defined. “Medicine have been my consolation. That was what stored me [going].”
Graziano mentioned that medication have been the “answer” to her issues, together with dealing with the dying of her father Anthony Graziano — former consigliere of the Bonanno household — and the tip of her marriage to Hector Pagan Jr.
“In some unusual means … I believe typically self-medicating stored me alive,” she admitted. “As a result of I believe if I’d have actually needed to dwell by means of it with out medicating I may not have made it. And that’s the reality and I don’t even like to speak that means however that’s the reality.”
“I can’t blame anyone for my habit,” she mentioned. “I can’t. I’d wish to. I believe my ex-husband has a hand in it, I believe my way of life has a hand in it. However finally, it’s my duty to take or to not take one thing. I’m very clear on that half.”
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In March, Graziano opened up concerning the near-fatal overdose she had final yr, sharing on Bunnie XO’s Dumb Blonde podcast how she was hospitalized after taking medication laced with fentanyl.
“I simply misplaced my s—, man. September 18, somebody gave me a bag of fentanyl,” she recalled, explaining that she was given a foul batch of an unspecified drug she hoped to get. “I died in a restaurant in Florida. I used to be useless, intubated for 3 days. Nobody in my household got here to the hospital and I spent 9 days there studying stroll once more.”
“That was it for me,” she mentioned, noting that she doesn’t keep in mind something from the overdose. “Three days are wiped from my mind. I don’t know what occurred in any respect.”
Graziano mentioned the near-death expertise — plus her household not being there — finally pushed her to alter her life and go to rehab shortly after. “They mentioned I wasn’t gonna make it and my household simply couldn’t do it,” she mentioned. “And I don’t blame them. I’ve put them by means of hell.”
The truth star just lately celebrated 9 months of sobriety for the reason that life-changing second.
In the event you or somebody you realize is scuffling with substance abuse, please contact the SAMHSA helpline at 1-800-662-HELP.